Islamic preachers often boast that Islam gave special rights to women, for example, Islam made it obligatory only for a man to give Mahr (Dowry) and Maintenance money to the woman, and not vice-versa.
But this boasting is wrong, while:
- In Islamic tradition, mahr is seen as compensation for the sexual pleasure (tamtee') that a man derives from his wife, and the exclusive access to her body that he enjoys.
- At the same time, he is free to marry multiple wives and engage in temporary sexual relationships with numerous slaves., but she is not allowed to even talk to any other man without the permission of his husband.
- And she has to provide him with sexual services, whenever he demands it, even if they are travelling on the back of a camel (according to Muhammad).
- Thus, Mahr is the payment of those sexual services, which she is obliged to provide to her husband on DEMAND.
- And she also has to give away her right to DIVORCE i.e. even if the husband is not suitable for her and she dislikes him, still she cannot get her freedom from him. And if she initiates Khul', then she has to give back the Mahr money to her husband as her ransom. This again proves that Mahr is not the right of a woman but it is there to provide sex services to her husband on demand.
And as far as the maintenance is concerned, then again Islam takes away many rights from a woman for this:
- She is prohibited to leave the house without the permission of her husband.
- She is even prohibited to visit her parents without his permission.
- Her husband gets the right to beat her in the name of maintenance money.
- She receives financial support, but only at the cost of surrendering her right to work outside the home and earn her own income. In practice, it is nearly impossible for a woman to find employment without her husband's permission, especially in societies where Islamic norms are strictly enforced.
- If a husband mistreats and tortures his wife, she cannot initiate a divorce proceeding on her own. Even if the husband chooses to divorce her, she often lacks the means to support herself independently. As a result, she may be coerced into remarrying.
- However, if she does choose to remarry, Islam dictates that she will lose custody of her children (please refer to our article on this topic: Islam: If a divorced woman remarries, then she will lose the custody of her children). The reason given by Islamic Scholars is that she cannot provide sex services to her newer husband in the presence of children from her earlier husband. Unbelievable.
- If the husband dies, then she is forced to mourn his death for 4 months and 10 days and she cannot remarry. But the husband does not have to mourn her death a single day, and he can have sex with his other wives and dozens of slave girls the same night.
In simple words:
- Even money is also spent on buying slaves.
- Slaves are also fed and maintained.
- Prisoners in the prisons are also fed and maintained.
- And women in Islam are not much different than slaves and prisoners.
Mahr: A Gamble Against Women's Financial Security
Moreover, Mahr is a GAMBLE. Although Muslims claim that gambling is Haram, but they are unable to see how Islam is compelling every woman and man to play this gamble in their lives.
- Nobody knows how long a marriage is going to last. One day or the whole life. It is a gamble for both sides, how much Mahr should be fixed.
- If the marriage breaks after 1 month, then the husband is on the losing side, and he has to pay the entire Mahr.
- But if the marriage breaks after 20 years, then the wife is on the losing side, while after 20 years she will be old and it will be difficult for her to remarry to get financial support from another man.
Islamic Family System is "Out of Balance"
The system of Islam is totally “Out of Balance”, while:
- All the financial burden is put solely upon the husband.
- It does not matter if he is poor, if he becomes ill, or even if he loses his job. This is again a gamble as no one knows if he will become ill or not, or loses his job or not. In all these cases, still it is only the husband, who has to bear the financial burden.
Compared to Islam, the Western system is totally in Balance. If a wife is rich, or she has a stable good earning job, and if she is healthy, then she has to share equal financial responsibilities, so that she becomes a support for her poor husband. Upon bringing this balanced system, Islamic preachers start doing false propaganda that the Western system put a lot of burden upon women but men are free of responsibilities.
Shared Responsibilities in the West
Moreover, if a wife goes for a job outside, then the husband is not sitting idly in the house and waiting for her wife to come back so that he can start ordering her. No, but both the husband and the wife work together in the house. Whether it is cooking, cleaning, or taking care of children etc. Thus, the West put all those responsibilities upon the men too, which is absent in the Islamic system.
Islamic Preachers: The West put a Double Burden upon Women in the name of "Equal Rights"
Maududi, a prominent Islamic apologist, argued that the West's concept of "equal rights" for women is misguided. He claimed:
The West claims it gave women the “equal rights”. But it didn't give this 'equal rights' to a woman, as a woman, but by making her a half man. They want a woman to do all the jobs which a man does. But naturally, a man cannot do all those jobs, which can be done only by a woman. Actually, the West wants women to perform all those duties, which 'nature' put upon women, and cannot be performed by men. And along with their own duties, women should bear equal load of those duties too, which 'nature' put upon men. Thus, the west want women to bear the 1+1/2 burden of duties, and men should bear only 1/2 of the burden. And they gave it the name of “Equal Rights”.
However, this argument falls apart under closer scrutiny. In reality, the West recognizes that women are capable of performing various jobs and tasks, just like men. There is no inherent reason why men should be exempt from participating in household chores or childcare simply because of their gender. In fact, many Western men take pride in being involved fathers and partners who contribute to domestic work.
Furthermore, the West acknowledges that women have specific needs and challenges related to childbearing and nursing. To address this, women in many Western countries enjoy extra rights and protections, such as paid maternity leave and flexible work arrangements. These provisions aim to support women during critical life events without forcing them to sacrifice their career aspirations or well-being.
Meanwhile, the Islamic family system remains grossly imbalanced. Women may be expected to stay at home and do nothing, even if they don't have children. Conversely, men must continue to work outside, regardless of their health or personal circumstances. This rigid gender role assignment neglects individual talents, abilities, and preferences, leading to unnecessary hardships and inefficiencies within families.
By exposing the flaws in Maududi's reasoning, we can see that the true source of exploitation lies in Islam's patriarchal attitudes toward women, rather than the West's pursuit of gender equality.
Dear Muslim Women! Please read Ghazali about your Rights in Islam as compared to your Husbands
Imam Ghazali wrote (Book "Counsel for Kings by Abu Hamid al-Ghazali", page 171):
The author of this book declares that it is the duty of gentlemen to respect the rights of their wives and veiled ones and to show mercy, kindness and forbearance to them. A man who wishes to become merciful and affectionate towards his wife must [remember] ten things (which will help him) to act fairly: (i) she cannot divorce you, while you can (divorce her whenever you wish); (ii) she can take nothing from you, 4 while you can take everything from her; (iii) as long as she is in your net5 she can have no other husband, while you can have another wife; (iv) (without your permission she cannot go out of the house, while you can ;)6 (vi) she is afraid of you, while you are not afraid of her; (vii) she is content with a cheerful look and a kind word from you, while you are not content with any action of hers;7 (viii) she is taken away from her mother, father and kinsfolk (for your sake), while you are not separated from any person unless you so wish; (ix) you may buy concubines and prefer them to her, while she has to endure this ;8 (x) she kills herself (with worry)9 when you are sick, while you do not worry when she dies (i.e. only a woman has to undergo Iddah of 4 months and 10 days as mourning if the husband dies, while the husband does not have to mourn for a single day and he can have sex with his other wives and slave girls the same night when his wife dies).