Please take a moment to understand the immense suffering that people like us — those born homosexual — endure while living under the shadow of religious doctrine. This is not a mere lifestyle or choice. This is our existence. And yet, our existence is treated as a curse, a crime, a mistake.
In religious societies, we are told that homosexuality is a sin, worthy of punishment as if we were never meant to exist for the same purpose as heterosexuals. Our lives are portrayed not as valid but as warnings to others. We are reduced to being "tests" — trials for our families, temptations for others, reminders of what not to become.
To survive, we are expected to lie — to bury our true selves and perform heterosexuality just to be accepted, just to avoid shame, hate, or even death. We are forced to hide in plain sight, wearing masks of normalcy, while suffocating inside.
Religious teachings tell us that God gives no soul a burden greater than it can bear. But what kind of burden is this? To be told that our very nature is a test while others are free to love and be loved — that is not justice. It is cruelty disguised as piety. Some of us are pushed so far that we begin to contemplate whether death might be easier than this daily torment.
We are denied the most basic human experiences: love, companionship, intimacy, and joy. All the things that heterosexual Muslims are allowed — even encouraged — to enjoy, often multiple times over. The Prophet of Islam married several women, including slaves, and his desires were praised. But if someone like me holds my partner's hand, I am shamed, judged, and expected to live in lifelong celibacy. That isn’t morality. That’s oppression.
It goes beyond being left out. We feel like strangers in our own bodies. We question our worth, our sanity, our safety, constantly wondering if some thought, some word, some action will earn us the wrath of God or the hatred of society. We live in fear, always pretending, always shrinking ourselves to fit a mold we never chose.
We are told we are pedophiles, rapists, or possessed by evil spirits. We are accused, dehumanized, and treated like threats to society. Some won’t even let us near our own nieces or nephews, as if our presence might infect them.
You cannot imagine the horror of being dragged into exorcisms or forced into conversion therapy. The mental, emotional, and physical torment of being told to "change" something that was never a choice. Even if we find someone to love, we live in fear: of judgment, of ridicule, of being mocked for something as simple and innocent as wanting to share our lives with another person.
In many Islamic societies, being openly gay means being shut out of everything. Healthcare, jobs, banks, housing, emergency services — any one of them might become a weapon in the hands of a homophobe. We fear not only rejection but violence, medical neglect, and political condemnation. Religious leaders invade our privacy. Doctors breach confidentiality. Our dignity is ripped away just because we dared to exist.
I could go on but perhaps now you see what we face. If there is a God, and if this is the world He made for us, then His mercy seems to have limits. Or perhaps, He is not the one denying us mercy. Perhaps it is people like Zakir Naik and others who twist religion to spread hatred and suffering in His name.
Either way, we bleed. Silently. Daily. While others look away.
Words of Support from a US LGBT Voice to Ex-Muslims Enduring Hardship in Islamic Lands
After the publishing of our article, we got this message, which is truly encouraging and serves as a source of enlightenment and inspiration.:
I’ve been working for LGBT rights in the US since the 90s. For all of the differences , the environment in the US was very similar to what you’re describing. Homosexuality was illegal - gay bars were busted by the police resulting in mass arrests that would ruin people’s careers and lives. Dressing in “clothing of the opposite gender” was illegal and would result in arrest. Gay sex was not made a right that people have until 2003, when a Texas sodomy law, which they were trying to enforce, was found to be unconstitutional. Marriage equality was not established until 2015. And currently, those rights and others are under attack in the US, again by religious extremists trying to use force to make society conform to their hateful and medieval vision in order to restore themselves to power.
Before that, in christian countries, homosexuality could and did carry the death penalty. Just like in Muslim countries, sometimes it was “tolerated,” but it was never acceptable, and even the randomness of enforcement left everyone living under a cloud of fear.
You have all of my love and support, and that of the global LGBT community. Islam is wrong - both about this and in general - and it is my hope that the tides of history will reform Islam as a religion to create more reformationist schools of thought. It took christianity a couple of millennia and a whole reformation and enlightenment to get to where it is, and the political winds driven by western interference have not been pushing Islam in a great direction because it has tended to encourage radicalism.
I think that LGBT Muslims should leave Islam, but then I think everyone should. Same with Christianity. I think we, as the queer community, have an additional perspective and thus an additional push, and we have a community of mutual support and understanding, but it’s still a journey. If people cannot, it’s still understandable. It’s all a process of education and reflection.
I’m going to recommend a recent movie about a gay relationship and the tensions it causes in a Muslim man. It’s called Breaking Fast, and if you have not seen it, you might find it a source of understanding. I’ve known gay Muslims, gay Hindus, and gay Christians. Every culture’s struggle is unique, and every person’s struggle is unique, but we all have far more in common amongst our struggles and experiences than we have divisions.
I hope that Islam can enter into a new period where an alternative to fundamentalism becomes dominant. I hope that you, and your LGBT sisters, brothers, and others can emigrate to a country and culture where you are free, even though I realize those freedoms are traded for other things that are also dear.
Most of all, I hope you are, and remain, safe.
We are thankful to our American friend for this precious feedback.
Hassan Radwan